Monday, June 30, 2008

Funny

" Know that penises in numbers equal stupidity. Even if a vagina came flying through the air, they would just stare at it because their brains don't work fast enough to figure out what to do with it."

" maybe you have heard of those women who LOVE to give B.J's.... those girls are either single or porn stars."

Jenny McCarthy - Life Laughs

Urban Dictionary.com

What's your name? Christa

1. christa

to pull a christa is to do something stupid and still look great while you are doing it

i fell down the stairs but my penis fell out and everyone was impressed

wow you pulled a christa

2. christa

Verb. Underdressing with the mind.

I christed that girl up and down.-christa as past tense.

3. Christa

A ho that gives great deep throated BJ's; loves to screw guys for free and has a great ass.

Man she is such a Christa.


4.
Christa

everyone wants to plow you, yet you "cock block" them with a steel bible. really, a bitch that hides behind Jesus and a smile, not to mention kickass thighs. mmmmm
you fucking, christa, douche-bag!!! get out of my house if you're not gonna put out!

How old are you? 26

1. 26

750ml of alky
1 mickey + 1 mickey = a 26

2. 26

A lot of booze. 750ml of alcohol. Pronounced "two-six" NOT twenty-six
"Hey man, you think a two-six will work?"

3.
26

26 inch rims....damn, those things are big!
"they never seen 26's on a hummer, my goal is to try f**k trina by the summer" -Young Buck & G-Unit, Betta Ask Somebody

4. 26

The term Twenty Six originated in Cairo, Egypt in 1999, among a group of Egyptian-Canadians and Egyptian-Americans when they were in their early 20s. It means that there is someone around the vicinity who can overhear and understand the group conversations. The term was first used in Arabic Language as Seta Wa'Ishreen.
- Shit, I hate this guy
- Twenty Six (means the guy could hear)

5. 26

no!no! it is a good number. but you guys wouldn't understand. you just wouldn't get it. it's special.
we love 26. we are both women, which makes us lesbians.

One of your friends? Jami

1. jami

a person who likes to eat peaches while extracting germans from the grand canyon.
man that chick is soooooo jami.

3.
Jami

The most beautiful, gorgeous, and stellar Princess in the universe. Brown hair, blue eyes and looks that could kill. With a personality to match. Make a wonderful mother, and the perfect wife.
I want Jami
I need Jami
I love Jami
There is only one Jami

4. Jami

Jami is hella cool, sweet, nice, and funny. Master Jami's love Mariah Carey and giving french kisses.
Jami was on the computer being hella funny but she had to go, so she gave french kisses.

What should you be doing? cleaning house

1. cleaning house

To be in the process of either -To be effortlessly winning at any form of gambling where one plays against The "house" or "bank". Now extended to also mean effortlessly winning at friendly card games or any form of gambling. -To be pulverising the opposition when heavily outmubered. Can refer to massacres, brawls or anything similar.
"He was cleaning house at the craps table last night"
"He's cleaning house at the drugs den because he has a wicked AK."
"The undertaker is in the ring and is cleaning house."

Favorite food? Chocolate Chip Cookies

1. chocolate chip cookies

The Definitive Taste Treat when warm enough to have the chocolate chips semi solid and, combined with cold whole milk. This improves one's view of the world and life in general, by significant degrees.
Chocolate chip cookies and whole milk... YUM, YUM!!!!


2. chocolate chip cookies

Something that is super yummy. The definition of hot. Must have a hot mohawk.
all the girls have butterflies in their stomachs as they see chocolate chip cookies do yoga.

Hometown? Cloverdale

1. cloverdale

a small town in sonoma county (nor cal) where there is not shit to do
Wyatt "lets go do something." Greg "we cant, we're in Cloverdale."

word to describe yourself? Mother

1. Mother

Random word when someone says something random and annoying
Annoyance: "Ewww, What's that" You: "Your MOTHER!!"
Annoyance: "Miss,What are we doing 2day" You: "Your MOTHER!!"
Annoyance: "This work is so easy, Miss" You: "Just like...your MOTHER!!"
Annoyance: "Peanut" You: "Your MOTHER!!"

2. mother

1.A female human being whom gave birth to you. 2.Term of profanity used by most civilizations in the world.
1.My mother is going to ditch me for her new boyfriend.
2.The most insulting insult in Chinese is 'caonimabi', means 'f*%# your mother's p*ss#'.


3. Mother

Short for "Mother F-er".
He's one bad mother.

4. Mother

1)...enlengthened form of Mom.
2)A woman who constantly bitches at you for random shit you probably didn't do, to achieve her miserble self-fufillment.
1) Kid: "HEY MOM!!" Mother: "Speak properly, junior. Use 'Mother' instead of 'Mom,' so I can brag to my friends what a sophisticated and trained little boy I have.

Car you drive? Yukon

1.YUKON

A large, but unresponsive clitoris; a FRIGID RIDGE; an antonym for ICON.
No matter how vigorously she yanked the YUKON, Nan's hooded sluggard remained in hibernation, while her bearded lips yawned and sneered at her efforts.

Last Person you talked to on the phone? Jami

see above

Nickname for best friend? Mamie.

1.mamie

a young woman who goes through pms every 3 seconds

or: Sleeze (he/he)

1. sleeze

an individual who typically has greasy hair and has a boastful personality, feels overly self-important, and can be frequently found insulting, groping, or making sexual remarks towards women.
Only a sleeze like Carl would stare at a woman's breasts during an introduction.


2. sleeze

a girl who is a slut
I know a sleeze when I see one. She was lookin for the D.

Sunday, June 29, 2008

oh, just some pictures....





So, I'm sitting here on a Sunday afternoon, almost 12:00, waiting for my husband to return home so we can go food shopping at Sam's for the 4th. We were supposed to have left around 11:00. For those of you not familiar with my husbands habits with time:



- if he says about an hour.... it will be at least two



- if you say 3:00.... it will be 4:00



- if he says " won't take long".... you will be waiting for a few hours


It is really a very annoying bad habit of his. However, he does it so often I can usually plan around what he says. That is why I'm still sitting here, on the computer, not dressed, dirty teeth, sleeping baby, instead of being ready and waiting for him to get here. I'm thinking no earlier than 12:30 - 12:45. My two older children are at my mom's, swimming their little hearts out ( even though it is not very warm at all, kinda chilly with the wind, actually), and Harry ( Vern's mom) is going to watch Emma for us, since she doesn't seem to care for car rides much ( if her non-stop screaming is any indication, anyway). Emma, by the way, not Harry. I'm not sure if any of you have had the pleasure of being in a vehicle with a baby who hates her car seat, but take it from me... it's not something you want to experience anytime soon. Emma isn't quite as bad as Lakin was.... yet. We still have time. Why is it that I get the only two babies, ever, that despise their car seats? Two in a row. It just doesn't seem quite fare.


Jami's baby shower was yesterday. It was just wonderful!! Her mom did a really good job with everything, especially finding about a hundred bags that matched the hundred outfits she bought! The cake was so cute, it had a little fondant pregnant woman sitting on top. She had little shoes and everything. Vern said she even looked like Jami. He-He. She got tons of presents, mostly clothes. Lots and lots of clothes. But what fun is a girl if you can't get them clothes? Of course she didn't really get any of the things she really needed like bottles, blankets, diapers, wipes, receiving blankets, crib sheets, nail clippers etc., baby proofing stuff..... but at least little Ava will be dressed good!! Oh, and I almost forgot to mention...the games at her shower were spectacular!! The best games I've seen played yet (of course, I did the games).


These pictures I'm posting are just some random ones that I'm putting up just cause I wanted to. The ones on top are of the kids swimming at moms, on some random day. The ones on bottom are of the kids on their quest for treasure ( Dawson found a snail shell). I hope everyone had a spectacular weekend and will have a wonderful week. I will see most of you next Saturday, but I'm sure you'll hear from me before that!

Okay... it is now 10:20 p.m. and he still isn't home. Just kidding... well, our afternoon started out wonderfully! Vern stopped by Sweet Tea, a little boutique in Plainfield that I hadn't heard about until yesterday, but was dyeing to go and check out. He sat in the car, but hey, beggars can't be choosers and all that. It was such a cute little store!! I think it could definitely be one of my new favorites. The prices weren't to bad, either. To cute, you all HAVE to check it out. Then we went to Steak "N" shake for lunch, which for some of you is no big deal, but for us it was major! It has been a very long while since we have ate out.... since March, actually, on his birthday ( thanks mom and Jerry!). And it has been even longer than that with no kids. Sad, I know, but that is the story of our life for the next 10 years or so. Anyway, we get to Sam's and don't get the membership right away, but decide to look around first. We ended up filling our cart with all sorts of goodies, and figured we'd just get the card before we checked out. During all of this, Harry called to inform me that I forgot to put formula in Lakin's bag....big bad mom moment! So of course, the doors are locked and we are on 10th street. We were able to handle what could have been a very bad thing, though. Thank goodness. We just had her break in, no big deal. I felt like such a stupid head. Bad mom, bad mom, bad mom!!!!!!! It all just went down hill from there, of course. We finish up our shopping, and decide we better leave and go get the kids. So Vern goes up to the counter and of course the line is way long ( when we first got there, no one was in line). Then evidently, the process isn't fast, he was up there for about 20-25 minutes. Then I see the lady at the desk putting her arms up and shaking her head...uh-oh. 10 more minutes go by. Vern waves me up to the counter. He informed me that they won't take VISA credit there, only debit. Of course our card is Visa. The problem with this is that we were paying with the business and my darling husband doesn't know his pin for his business account. So he's pissed, arguing with the lady about it ( we all know it isn't her fault) so I'm embarrassed. then he wants to know if there is enough money in the personal account to cover it... guess what... I don't know. This of course makes him mad, I should know exactly how much money is in that account. We try it anyway. I bet you can guess what happened.... DENIED!! This definitely didn't make him any happier, but he was sure to let them all know that I didn't balance the account.. whoops! I wasn't embarrassed about that, hey it happens, but he sure was. I never said we had enough money. So basically, we wasted an entire day. And came home with a grouchy, mean man and no food. He got over it. The worst part is, that after I balanced the check book, we were only short about 10 dollars. Sucks, huh? Anyway, just wanted to share the rest of my evening with you while waiting for these other pictures to download ( since it takes a gazillion minutes for each picture). I'll have more for you in a day or two!


Friday, June 27, 2008

Marley Gums...












So I'm awake, and it's exactly 12:58 a.m. But I'm awake because of a dog, not because of the baby. A dog who at the moment is trying to climb up Lakin ( who slept in the living room with dawson) and is now attacking and eating my flip flop. Now paper....now my pants... H slept for about 2 hours ( now my toes..it tickles!!!) then started to cry. I got up to take him out, but I always have a fear a coyote is going to try to come and eat me, so that only lasted a few minutes ( now my right hand). So I came in and put him on a puppy pad instead, but he just tried to eat it, surprise, surprise. ( my pants again) I realize I shouldn't be playing with him, I should have taken him out and put him ( my toes) right back in his cage, but I tried it and he cried. So I let him stay up to play for a little while. Bad habits already? ( TICKLE!!!!!) About Marley Gums..... Tracy called today, well yesterday I guess, and asked if I wanted a puppy. Some MExicans dropped him off, said they were taking him to the pound if nobody wanted him. Tracy to puppy rescue!! Anyway, after I saw his pictures, I had to at least give it a try. The spanish-american people told Tracy that he was a Maltese and 4 wks old. Awww... a little baby!! I know it's going to be a lot of work, but I figured if it got to hard, we'd just find him a new home. The kids LOVE him, especially Dawson. He now wants to live here, actually. My darlings are driving me crazy, the poor dog can't walk without one of them picking him up or stopping in front of him ( keeps running off before mentioned puppy pad), but Dawson is doing really good with him... he even got peed on and didn't freak!! ( it's now 1:13, and still full of energy!) ( My toes!!!!!) I don't think he's really 4wks., with the way he's running around and playing, he seems a lot older. He's doing the but wiglgle before he attacks something!!!! To cute!! I'm going to try and get him into the vet at the beginning of next week, so they can tell me how old, and if they think he's full Maltese ( or Maltese at all??), just a general check-up. He seems healthy, though. He doesn't stink and acts like a puppy should, eating can food and drinking water, eating instead of peeing on the puppy pad, chewing on toys and shoes.. all those puppy things puppy's do. Anyone know what a Maltese pup looks like??? ( Checking out the kitchen..gettin brave!!) ( oh, he's back) ( climbing on Lakin's head again...) Oops... potty on the floor.. of course not on the pad I just sat him on. At least it's about the size of a dime. If your wondering about the name, Lakin wanted to name him Gums ( I have no idea where that came from), but Dawson and I came up with Marley and Gavin was okay with it, so we settled on Marley Gums (eating paper again). Anyway, just thought since I was awake anyway, that I would blog about the possible permanent member of our family...ooh, looks like he's finally getting tired.. time to go back in his cage!! Bye bye for now!! ( it's now 1:25 a.m.)

Broken water hose & mud puddles


We went outside to hook up our sprinkler one afternoon, and realized that our water hose had a hole in it. Apparently, the person who mows our grass ran it over.. ooops! Anyway, we didn't have another hose and Lakin REALLY wanted to play in the water, so we just used the hole as a sprinkler! She was just as happy with that as she was with the sprinkler, if not more so! She found a muddy spot in the yard, and just had a blast jumping in it then washing off her feet in the water. We were finally able to coax Mr. I just want to stay inside and watch T.V. and complain about being bored, outside with us, too. Of course, I had to spend about 15 minutes talking him into getting in the mud, but he finally did and guess what?? He had fun! I didn't manage to get any pictures of anything but his feet, but he did join us outside for a little while, at least I have his feet to prove it. His sister has a better tan then he does this year! He's usually super dark, but it's like pulling teeth to get him to come outside during the day. Maybe after we put up this little pool, he'll come out more often.





Thursday, June 26, 2008

Garage sale V.W. Bug....

Mom and I went (well we tried anyway), to go garage sale-in this weekend. Mostly it was a bust, there weren't really that many sales, and with all three of my wonderful ,very pleasant, very happy, content children along with us, it just wasn't as fun as it could have been. But I guess other than the " I'm hungry" "i'm thirsty" " I want a toy" " I'm ready to leave" " waa waa waa waa", it wasn't to bad. We did find the buy of the day, which is this little blue volkswagon beetle powerwheels. Yes, it's a little beat up, looks pretty rough, kinda looks like it came from the wrong side of the power wheels track, but it just made Lakin's day!! For 30 dollars, you can't beat it! The battery is sorta ill, but nothing a new one can't fix. She just can't get enough ( of the full 30-45min. before the battery dies) of having Gavin drive her all around the yard. Or in today's case, Dawson driving all of them around. It's turned out even better than I thought because the boys love it, too!! Since Lakin can't seem to understand the concept of LEAVING her foot on the gas pedal, she doesn't get very far very fast. Just a lot of jerky starts and stops. But, lucky for her she has her own little personal chaufers. To cute!! Sometimes it's amazing how something from a garage sale can make your child so happy, which in turn makes me happy!! Now hopefully it will just last until Emma gets a turn at it, then we won't have to buy one for her.

Just in case I haven't talked to you, our 4th of July party is on the 5th. We are starting the food about 5:00, but you can come anytime. I'm asking everyone to bring some sort of dish or food and a 2-liter or 12 pack of a drink, to help save on our beverage costs. We will provide the main course food and the entertainment!!! Oh yeah, if you want alcohol, bring your own. I'm sure we will have some, but not enough for everyone. This means you Jami..... I know how you'll try to sneak all my alcohol!!! J/K I hope to see you all there!!! It will be fun, fun, fun!!!!


Also... my bi-opsy results came back in the yuck ( I'm not sure what they call it, not good?). I go in for my LEAP on the 8th, which I'm sure is going to hurt like hell, but I'm super woman!!! Anyway, there is a good chance that this will take care of the problem, by cutting out all of the bad cells. As long as they don't come back, we are in the clear!! So other than more than average paps ( can't wait!!), hopefully all will be better.


I'm Back.......


OMG!!!! To be without Internet for 2 weeks, only to have it dangled in front of you and taken back away..... let me tell ya, it's been hell! Just awful, don't try it. Our modem went ka-pluey again, so we decided to just get a new stinking computer. So it comes last night and I'm SOOO excited! I hook it all up by myself ( I'm so proud), and immediately hook up the Internet and sign on. I missed it so much!! I only had 843 e-mails, not to many, really. Everything was working wonderfully. I was so tired though, I only spent about 30 minutes on-line. This morning, I sign right back on, but it wasn't working!! SHIT! I could still read and send e-mail, but wasn't able to bring up any web pages, my blog specifically. WTF????? I have been so deeply angry all day, I wasn't very excited about my new computer any longer ( not to mention this VISTA sucks!). I just got off the phone about 20 minutes ago with DELL, after spending about an hour with AOL ( and dealing with a very unhappy, very LOUD Emma), and was finally able to open my blog!! The man told me congratulations, I was so excited!!! But of course, I can't be happy with the fact that I have to open it through Internet explorer instead of AOL like I'm used to, so I decide to try AOL.... no luck. I go back to I.E. and guess what, it doesn't work either....shoot me please, I almost cried! So I went through all of the steps DELL had me go through and it worked again, but I'm sure by tomorrow it won't any longer. Nothing can ever be easy. In the mean time... I wanted to try and upload a few pictures, just to see if it would work, the one of Emma did, isn't it cute???? I will be putting about a hundred pictures up in the next day or so, you all have missed out on so many photo ops in the past two weeks!! I have so much catching up to do!! So expect lots of e-mails and LOTS of pictures!!!!

Saturday, June 7, 2008

General News 6-7-08

Is everyone having a good weekend?? Anybodies home float away? It turned out to be a pretty nice afternoon, though. I have another B-day party to go to tomorrow, then no more ( kids anyway) until September! Anyway, not sure if I wrote ( think I did) that my 6wk checkup pap came back abnormal again. I went in Thursday for another coco-thingy (one day I'll learn the name!), and ol' Clark ended up having to do a bi-opsy. He took small ( no bigger than the tip of a pen) samples from three different spots. Now we just have to wait.. again. The tests should be back in about a week. Basically, if these come back in the high category ( which he seems to think is a good chance), then I'll come back in and get a LEAP done. That stands for some big word, but is basically just going in with a heated piece of metal and cutting out a large chunk of my cervix. From there I'm not sure what happens. He said by doing that, it may be enough to cure the problem, by cutting out all the bad cells, but maybe not. Another wait and see thing. I bet that's gonna hurt REAL bad!! They numb your cervix for that, at least. The biopsy wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, just a lot of cramping, during and after. Oh, and cervix falling out of me!!! So other than having to go back to a stupid pad again ( nothing in for at least 4 weeks), and coffee ground like substances falling out, not nearly as bad as what I thought. I'll let you know when I get the call.

We are having a 4th of July party again this year, on the 5th. Mark your calendars!! Everyone bring a dish, I don't care what, surprise me! Same ol' food, dogs, burgers, brats, ham & beans... bring chairs and your own alcohol, even though I'm sure we'll have something. We'll start cooking around 4, but you can come at anytime, you just might get put to work with food prep!! It's a Saturday, so no work the next day!! Oh bring cameras, and plan on giving me copys!!!

Emma, 2months



two months already... not the most flattering pictures, but they do well to see her growth. She's kinda, almost smiling in one of them! ANyway,

Emma at 6 months:

- eating 4oz every 3-4 hours, sometimes wants a "snack" after an hour or so
- staying alert for longer moments, sometime up to 45 mintues to an hour
- takes many 20-30 minute naps and one 3-4 hour nap throughout the day
- sleeping from about 9:30 to 5:30, then goes back to sleep until 8 or 9:00
- still wearing newborn onesies, but outfits are to short
- wore first 0-3 months outfit
- no longer in newborn diapers, moved to size 1!
- smiled! Smiles mostly in the morning and evening right before bed
- fussy (gassy?) in the evenings
- when awake, has to be held, except.....
- when gassy/fussy, likes to be swaddled and put in bouncy chair on vibrating mode ( my new babysitter!)
- seems to prefer mommy, but is with me ALL the time
- loves her binky!! ( This is a first for my kids)
- is V-E-R-Y happy when naked!!! ( no surprise there, just like her brother and sister!)
- cry's immediatly after making poopy, doesn't seem to mind wet diapers
- likes bath's, until you wash her hair
- two month check-up- the 19th

- growing up way to fast!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Friday, June 6, 2008

Summer Days

Was just playing with my camera, and who better to take pictures of than Lakin...






Sunday, June 1, 2008

Dawson's 8th Birthday Party(s)

Did everyone have a good weekend? Mine was swell! Saturday was Dawson's 8th ( I still can't believe he's 8) birthday party. It was a wonderful party and we had a lot of fun. The best part about that day was getting the call from the doctor about the results of the down syndrome test. It came back negative!!! Now we just have to get through, and be strong for Jami and Eric, the surgeries that will follow Ava's birth. This I can handle. It will be very hard for the two of them, I can't even imagine going through what they are going to have to in the next few months, but I will do everything I can to be there for them. This just makes me realize how incredibly lucky I am to have three healthy children, and to have never had to experience any of the things that Jami is going through.

Now, Dawson's party! Fun, fun, fun! If anyone wonders why there aren't many pictures of precious Gavin, (not surprisingly), he pretty much refused to let us take his picture. But that's Gavin for ya! yes, Jami and I painted our faces, but why can't we have fun, too? I have to say, that we are the cutest out of everyone! The first half of the pic.'s are from his party, the second half are from his b-day at Chuckie cheese with his grandpa.




Dawson, in full clown dress
Aren't we lovely???
Jami, me, Aryssa, Lakin, & Dawson
Jami in evil clown mode Lakin & AryssaAwww... how cute........ Gavin
Aryssa & Lakin
Jami & Dawson

Dawson & Gavin at Chuckie Cheese




Lakin... ride that pony!!
Gavin & Dawson.....whoa!! Roller coaster!

It's the girls' turn

Aryssa & Dawson
Gavin & Lakin

Dawson...vroom, vroom.........

Cheese!!!!1
Aren't we adorable!!!!!!!!!!