As I sit here and listen to my two oldest children argue over a bag of doughnuts, I'm holding the newest addition to my family. Smelling her new baby smell, listening to her little baby breaths, again realizing how quickly they grow up. It's sad to me. Some people are ready for their kids to grow, get out on their own, to have their time back to themselves. But me, I don't want them to grow...ever. It almost seems I was just holding Lakin like I am now holding Emma, but then I see her get herself dressed and pour her own drinks. I just want to prolong every single day that I can. My kids are the best gifts that I have ever received, and it amazes me how much I've changed and how much more meaningful little things, like finding pretty rocks or pretending to be an airplane, can be. I was young with Gavin, but I wish everyday that I would have realized how much I would miss never doing those things with him. I just didn't realize how important those things can be. Now, especially since Emma, I look at things in a whole different way. Lakin started that change, and now Emma is changing my outlook even more. If I had nothing but my children on some days, that would be enough. I can't believe that my baby will be in 1st grade in just a few months, can't get over knowing how badly Lakin wants to go to school. That on that day this September, she'll hug me, kiss me and tell me bye, all without a tear. And before I know it, Emma will be joining them and I'll be lost. who knows, by then there may be another one. And I'm sure I'll sit and say " why do I keep having these kids?" as they sit and fight over things like who's going to hold the doughnut bag. But I'll look back and miss every minute of it one day.
On a lighter note... Emma is now three weeks old!! She is doing really well. She had either a case of allergies or her first cold last week, but she's back to almost normal again. She is by far the best eater that I've had! She finished 5oz yesterday! The norm is 4oz every 3-4 hours, but a lot of times, she'll want another ounce or two w/in the hour. Vern says he remembers Lakin doing the same thing, but Lakin only ate 2oz at a time for the first 4 months! Amazingly, she isn't really getting fat, but she is definitely getting longer. She's still in newborn diapers and 0-3 month clothes are ( literally) falling off of her. Newborn clothes are still really loose, but they are gradually getting to short. Sleeping is touch and go with her. If your holding her, she sleeps wonderfully. She is still spending most of her days doing just that, though.She goes about 4 hours at night, most the time, which is actually pretty good. She has even went 6 once or twice, but, I admit, she was sleeping with me. I try not to do that, but sometimes I'm just so tired! But for the most part, she hasn't changed much, and still isn't very exciting, but I actually enjoy her non-exciting ways.
Oh yes, I have to share a moment of amusement, courtesy of Lakin: Sunday evening, I was informing her she had a doctors appointment today ( which I rescheduled). She got very upset, insisting repeatedly that she didn't want to go, no big surprise. When I responded with " they'll just see how big you are and you'll talk to the doctor", and of course " you have to go". To which see said " no! I don't want my belly to be big!" How funny! She assumed that since I went to the doctor, that if she went, she would have a big belly, too. I just thought that was hilarious, and wanted to share with all of you.